Gratitude Post #6, Happy Thanksgiving

This is the final gratitude post before Thanksgiving but certainly not the end of my gratitude! The past several weeks have been enlightening for me, I am experiencing a lot of realization and growth right now. I am far from perfect and, more importantly, far from alone. Enjoy your Thanksgiving and the people you get to celebrate with. May God bless you this year! Today I am grateful:

1. To have a patient and loving family
2. To have wonderful and understanding friends
3. That I constantly have opportunities to learn more about myself
4. To live in such a beautiful place
5. To be healthy!

Gratitude Post #5

This is the fifth installment of my annual gratitude posts! Today I am grateful:

1. I have such wonderful friends
2. I have the tools to grow and change
3. To live in the South!
4. To be supported by my family
5. To have so many ways to connect with people

I hope you enjoy these posts and I look forward to hearing from you!

Gratitude Post #4

This is installment #4 of my annual autumn gratitude posts. I hope you are enjoying them and participating in your own way! Today I am grateful:

Shelby's First Cheer Medal!

1. I get to participate in my daughter's passions
2. My family is close and loves to do things together
3. To be going to New York this week with Wendy and Shelby (Central Park in fall, you know)
4. My business has had a really solid year
5. There are so many ways to connect with people!

Gratitude Post #3

Here is the next installment of my annual gratitude posts. Today I am grateful:

1. I have the freedom to vote
2. I have a loving and supportive family with whom I get to share my life
3. I have found a way of life that pushes me to grow physically, emotionally, and spiritually
4. I have the ability to travel
5. I am healthy!

I look forward to hearing from you, have a wonderful day and week!

Gratitude Post # 2 For 2010

Today I find myself in Charlotte,N.C. This is pretty cool because I am meeting with a group of families who are interested in having us start one of our Insight programs(www.theinsightprogram.com)here.So in that spirit I will begin this post.
1. I am grateful the work I do provides me with the opportunity to help a lot of families
2. I am grateful I get to work with so many committed people
3. I am grateful I got to spend last night carving pumpkins with my family
4. I am grateful I am in a position to do what I love
5. I am grateful I am around teenagers constantly, they are awesome!

Gratitude 2010!

A couple of years ago I started participating in something that has become a tradition for me. For the five Wednesdays ( I realize today is Thursday, but WTF no one is perfect) leading up to Thanksgiving I post five things for which I am grateful. This is something I love to do, it would be awesome if you joined me. If you don't feel like posting your own list, please enjoy mine. I realize this is something I look forward to every year and it has definitely had an effect on how I think throughout the year. So look forward to a gratitude post from me every Wednesday until Thanksgiving! Send me a link toy your blog, I would love to share in your gratitude as well. This week I am grateful for:

1. The beautiful autumn weather in Georgia
2. I get to share my life with two awesome women, Wendy and Shelby
3. I am able to own a business whose sole purpose is to help families heal
4. A life spent being aware of ways I can grow and change
5. To be surrounded by so many great teachers!

I look forward to reading your posts!

I Am That Dad!!!!

Shelby At Life Is Good 2010

Oh, sweet Jesus am I "that dad!" This picture should tell you a little bit, but I'll take it a few steps further for the sake of clarity:

• I am "that dad" who likes his daughter and is pretty sure the feeling is reciprocated. 
• I am "that dad" who dropped out of high school and is eternally grateful for that decision.
• I am "that dad" who believes the parent/child relationship is about the relationship between two autonomous human beings, not a power play to show who's boss or a way to form a person into my image.
• I am "that dad" who thinks spare the rod/spoil the child was a child rearing philosophy created by a d******* f*** so insecure about his own place in the world, he felt it necessary to bully a person for whom he was supposed to provide protection.
• I am "that dad" who is looking forward to his daughter's teenage years
• I am "that dad" who sees every day as an opportunity to become closer to his family
• I am "that dad" who f***s up more than he would like but can admit his shortcomings

I love this carnival! It got me all fired up, my list could be endless. Thanks for the idea Ronnie and Flo!

Ah, The Music Of My Youth!

Abbi and Alec at Metallica

Yesterday I received an e-mail from Alec Traaseth (very cool guy) informing me of a concert this October featuring Anthrax, Slayer, and Megadeth. Last year Alec, his sister Abbi, and I saw Metallica together and had a blast. We had discussed the possibility of seeing some more metal shows in the future so this one makes sense.

Recently I had a conversation with Shelby, my 11 year old daughter, about what some of the music scene was like when I was a teenager. I was born in 1968, so my musically formative years took place between 1982 and 1986. I spent a great deal of time in record stores which specialized in imported metal albums and would often try to impress my friends with a band so obscure they had yet to hear mention of their name. We all played the same game so it was rare that anyone would get stumped.

After annoying Wendy and Shelby with snippets of pre- I Am The Man Anthrax, pre- South Of Heaven Slayer, and a little taste of Peace Sells from Megadeth, I decided to compile a list of albums (yes kids, albums- ask your parents what that means) I absolutely wore out as a 14-16 year old. The albums I listened to while locked away in my room with headphones on. The ones that created a bit of hearing damage. Albums which defined my disturbed adolescence and provided me with some fuel to get through some pretty rough patches.

Me at Metallica

My tastes have changed over time, but when I think of these records, I can't help but smile. I would love to hear some of yours, maybe we will give each other some fond memories. Today, at 41, I am certainly not trying to impress anyone. But I must admit I feel kind of cool as I write this list. It doesn't matter how many you write, just share what comes to mind. I can't wait to read yours!!!

1. Kill 'Em All by Metallica. This album changed my life. I got it as a blind recommendation from a buddy and wore it out after a few weeks. Whiplash and Seek and Destroy were stand out songs for me.
2. Ride The Lightning by Metallica. Simply awesome.
3. Master Of Puppets by Metallica. To me, the greatest speed metal album ever. 
4. Diary of a Madman by Ozzy Osbourne. Randy Rhoads was my favorite guitarist
5. Holy Diver by Dio. Not a bad tune on it.

I know there were others, but these stand out right now. Share your list, I look forward to reading it.

What I Get To Learn Every Day

I love the typical "day in the life" I get to experience as an unschooling dad. For example, I stay connected through Facebook, blogs, and personal contact with wonderful families every day. My favorite experiences come when I pay attention to the continuing unfolding of Shelby's life.

Shelby is awesome. She teaches me simple but valuable lessons constantly.Her favorite activities right now center around making jewelry and cheerleading. She dedicates a lot of time and energy to both. When Shelby becomes interested in anything she finds a way to pursue it. One of the most vital tools in Shelby's life has been You Tube.

Through You Tube Shelby has learned to do make up, create jewelry, improve gymnastic moves, and many other skills. Shelby's primary reading tool has been Facebook. Shelby's first major art teachers were the shows Miami Ink and L.A. Ink.

For me, I am grateful I get to participate in Shelby's life. I am as excited to assist her in pursuing her passions as I am to do anything else. Already at eleven she has been to Ireland, Germany, all over the U.S., the Caribbean, and Canada. She has scuba dived, been Zorbing,and seen Paul McCartney. Already her life has been as rich as many who have lived much longer. As a parent I see a big part of my responsibility as being willing to pay attention and facilitate as many opportunities for her to experience as much as possible. What a wonderful life.

What Life Is Good Reminded Me Of

My family and I returned home from the Life Is Good unschooling conference yesterday. What a wonderful experience!  This was the first time we attended this particular conference. I volunteered to speak, and fortunately Mary Gold allowed me the opportunity.

From the time we arrived in Vancouver, Washington we felt as if we had arrived home. There were several people we were excited to see and many more we looked forward to meeting. The first speaker was Laura  Endres. It was my first time to meet Laura and hearing about her family's experiences was inspiring. Many others stood out as well; Ronnie Maier is always a fantastic speaker, Danielle Conger connects like no other, and Ben and Kelly Lovejoy provide great guidance and wisdom. The weekend was capped off by a fabulous concert featuring Kimya Dawson and Amy Steinberg. It was the perfect ending to a great weekend filled with love, laughter, and fellowship.

Every time I participate in one of these events I am reminded of what is important to me and why I live the way I do. I laughed my ass off several times. I had deep conversations with people whose opinion mattered to me. I did not give a f*** about who may judge me as a parent. I realized that this is how I feel most of the time. I have managed to create relationships in my life in which I am able to connect with people who challenge me to stretch as a person without ever feeling like I can't measure up.

I hope you feel the same way about your life. If so, continue to share with people how you pull this off. If not find some people you can ask how to make changes so you can enjoy your life. I would love to hear about some of your experiences, so leave a comment or e-mail me at clint@clintstonebraker.com.

A Fine Spring Day Indeed!

What a wonderful day for the Stonebraker family today! Wendy, Shelby, and I began the day by attending Farm Days at Rucker Horse and Pet. It was a great event and we all had fun with the different varieties of chickens, goats, donkeys, and even some snakes. We shop at Rucker fairly often, they're good people and very helpful.

From there,we headed to Lowes. It's time to add to our

raised bed gardens. We have found a ton of joy in these projects at home. It's something we all participate in together and we get to see some cool results. Once we finish these beds we'll have a total of seven. I can't wait until our summer crops start producing!

Days like today reinforce my gratitude. It was beautiful outside, I got to spend some fun time with my family, and we are creating something together. Not all days are like this but they give me a frame of reference for what my attitude needs to be. I love my family and my life. It is my responsibility to them, and to me, to remember to live in the moment and enjoy what I get to do as much as I can.

I Renounce Winter!

Yep, I've had it. Enough is enough. Winter, in all of its teeth chattering misery, needs to bid a fond farewell. I realize Mother Nature isn't too interested in my opinion on the matter, but I figure it doesn't hurt to speak my mind.

We Stonebrakers have been a busy little bunch. We have continued to harvest vegetables all winter, have been building our chicken collection, and started our seeds for the spring garden. Wendy and Shelby have really been the catalysts and we are all enjoying the projects.

Wendy's decision to put hoops in our raised beds has proven to be a brilliant idea. We have had an abundance of lettuce, spinach, mustard greens, turnips, and radishes. We also have carrots and onions well on their way.

Our four grown chickens are each laying about an egg a day (you do the math), and we have recently added three chicks. Eggs anyone?

All of this has certainly brought our family closer together. I am so grateful we get to do so much. I look forward to sharing our adventures with you and will keep you posted on our progress. In the mean time, enjoy our little video update and stay tuned!

Do What You Love

*This photo has nothing to do with the post, I just like it!*

There are many aspects of my life I absolutely love. My marriage, being a dad, relationships with friends and family, my work, the list goes on and on. I have written and shared a lot lately about our family travels. I want to share a little about why I love my work.

For the past twenty-two years, I have been in service to people in one capacity or another. My career in counseling began in 1987 at a drug and alcohol treatment program in St.Louis called Crossroads. I spent three wonderful years there and grew up a lot. I then moved on to Atlanta to become the program director at Insight, of which I eventually became the owner. I also spent seven fantastic years in Phoenix as the owner of Pathway. I have since sold Pathway and moved back to Atlanta and all of the experiences I have had are valuable.

A few years ago I decided to write a book, Connected: The Art of Building Relationships, because I feel the knowledge I have gained in my counseling career has value to a broader range of people. I have also begun a speaking career and have gotten certified as a coach.

My point is this: I love what I get to do every day. I look forward to the challenge of finding ways to help people. I relish opportunities to learn how I can improve. I am passionate about discovering new tools that benefit my fellow humans on this strange and beautiful journey of life. I believe what I do brings value and I love sharing this with others. How do you feel about what you do?

Final Thoughts On the Cruise

This is my final post from our cruise in January. I was putting together the last of the video footage I had and felt compelled to share my final thoughts. As I have stated before, this was a wonderful experience for my entire family. From diving at the Caymans and Cozumel, to horseback riding in the jungle of Belize, to zip lining in Roatan, I was fortunate to share an incredible time with Wendy, Shelby, and my in-laws.

This video shows Shelby on the water slide on the ship, the horse back ride, and our zip line experience. Notice how vividly green Roatan and Belize are. Two of the most beautiful places I have ever seen. I am grateful to share these experiences with you and hope you enjoy them!

The Unschooling Tour Guides

One of my favorite aspects of my family's unschooling life is the freedom we have to travel. Shelby and I have enjoyed recording our adventures as much as possible. It's fun both for the sake of posterity and our own entertainment.

At eleven, Shelby has had the opportunity to experience a lot of life. Between traveling to different locations, learning to scuba dive, and meeting so many wonderful people, she has enjoyed things many other people haven't. I am grateful to participate.

I hope you enjoy the video here, I realize it's a little long but I think it's worth it. I particularly love the fact that Shelby and I got to film it together. Carnival Valor was a fun ship, I highly recommend it!

Happy Birthday Shelby!

Today Shelby turned eleven! What a wonderful day. She has provided me with eleven years of joy, fun, laughter, and lessons. Shelby's amazing spirit and enthusiasm inspire me every day.

When I think about how far she has come and how much she has enriched my and Wendy's life, I am overwhelmed. Although it is a bit clichéd to say it seems like yesterday that we brought her home, it really does.

Reflecting on all of our experiences up to this point is awesome and I look forward to many more. Thanks, Shelby and keep being you!

Our Dive In Cozumel!

This post is about our second ocean dive, this time in Cozumel. Of course, there is a video at the bottom for your enjoyment.

We had heard about the awesomeness (real word) of diving in Cozumel for a long time. Many divers have extolled the joys of drift diving at this wonderful spot. I was particularly excited about this dive for that reason, the idea of following the current along the reef seemed very cool.

We arrived at the Blue Angel dive shop mid-morning ready to rock-n-roll. The sky was cloudy but it was very warm. We met our guide, Edgar, and waited for our boat to arrive. One thing that was cool about Blue Angel was they they were full service. They prepared all of our gear and took care of everything. All we really had to do was enjoy the boat ride and patiently wait.

Our first dive was supposed to be along the wall.It was about a 60'-65' dive. One thing cool about the wall is as you drift along, you look down and see nothing but blue. Apparently the depth is far enough to not be able to see the bottom. After Edgar explained the dive to us and we discussed the plan, it was time to go. This dive was doomed from the beginning. As soon as I jumped in, my regulator started to free-flow. This means that air flows through without stopping.Luckily, the dive shop had an extra regulator so they hooked me up with a replacement.

This did throw me off a little. I don't have much experience, so whenever anything unusual happens it takes me a minute to pull it together. But pull it together I did, and it was time to descend. Once we got to about 27', Shelby signaled she wanted to go to the surface. We didn't really know what was wrong, so we went up. Once we popped up at the surface, Shelby let us know she had been stung by a jelly-fish. What a bummer. She was pretty upset and we went back to the boat.

On the boat the Blue Angel folks were great. They had vinegar on board and were very kind and gentle with Shelby. There was no pressure to get back in and Edgar in particular was very understanding. After about 40 minutes we picked up the other divers and headed for the reef. I really didn't think Shelby would want to go back in, but once we arrived at the dive spot she said she wanted to try.

I am so grateful she made that decision, the dive was wonderful. The water was 79º and wonderful. The current was pretty strong which led to a pretty fun dive. We drifted along the reef at between 20' and 40'. The reef was beautiful.

We saw a wide variety of fish.Some of the highlights included a giant eagle ray and, of course, a barracuda. The entire experience was wonderful. I was really happy for

Shelby, it took a lot of courage for her to jump back in. Despite the jelly fish, Cozumel diving was a definite thumbs up. I'm sure we will dive there again.

Diving in The Caymans

I included the video at the bottom if you are interested.

This dive was our first ocean dive. We have had several fresh water dives and have eagerly anticipated our inaugural venture into the deep blue sea. We went to Sunset House for our diving needs. They came highly recommended and now I know why. Their service was impeccable.

We decided to hire a dive master since this was our first ocean dive and we were a bit frightened. The dive master was a wonderful British guy named Andy. He was very patient with us and a great guide.

Our dive was a shore dive. All that really means is that you don't go out in a boat.

There is a sea pool you initially jump into before you swim out to deeper waters. What was cool about this particular spot was that the current actually sucked us out into the ocean. It wasn't difficult work for us and it was a cool sensation.

The water temperature was 79º ON JANUARY 12th!!!!! It was fantastic. On our first dive we went to a depth of 37'. The visibility was at least 50'-60'. The water was a little choppy so it wasn't limitless, but I'm certainly not complaining. We saw a lizard fish, a sea turtle, a peacock flounder, and several angel fish. The reef was incredible. We stayed down for about 31 minutes.

On the second dive, after a 57 minute surface interval, we went to a depth of 47'. It was the deepest I have been which was pretty exciting. An artist had placed a statue of a mermaid on the ocean floor, so we visited it. We also had two barracudas swim right in front of us. Surprisingly, none of us were afraid. There is something about being in that environment which removes some of the fear of being around the animals that are supposed to be there.

The entire experience was incredible. I am so grateful to have shared it with Shelby and Wendy. I hope you enjoy the footage and I will post about our dive in Cozumel soon!

They Eat Those Things?!?!?

We just returned from a cruise through the Western Caribbean. It was a wonderful experience. I learned a lot about some different cultures, which I love to do. I learned that a little coconut oil completely changes beans and rice. I learned that there really are jungles. I saw that Caribbean reefs are prettier in person than in pictures. I also learned that some of our friends enjoy partaking of a dish called Bamboo Chicken. Sounds tasty, maybe even a little exotic.

Before you start hunting for this at your local Piggly Wiggly, allow me to inform you of what Bamboo Chicken really is.

But before I do......

Wendy, Shelby, and I decided to venture into the countries we visited rather than rely on the cruise's excursions.

We recognized that by booking our own adventures that we would experience a little more authenticity.

We were right.

Our first stop was Grand Cayman. It was fantastic!

We dove with our guide, Andy through Sunset House. We did a shore dive which was also our first dive in the ocean.

Grand Cayman is a beautiful island. Andy referred us to a local spot for lunch called Hammerhead's. Really good food and great atmosphere.

We next ventured into Roatan. I had only become familiar with Roatan a few months ago after my family started diving. Roatan is a small island off the coast of Honduras.

Although we didn't dive here, we experienced something almost as fun. We zip-lined through the jungle. This was a great experience. One of the highlights was that our guide, Pedro, actually built the course. It was a blast.

Next we headed to Belize.

Again, I had never really been familiar with Belize but once I started doing some research I got really excited. It too has a huge reef and a beautiful interior. We decided to go horseback riding through the jungle. We went to a resort deep in the jungle called Banana Bank lodge. It was unbelievable.

It is right on the Belize River and surrounded by the thick jungle. We were surrounded by Howler monkeys and even saw a wild Tucan in the trees. Pretty amazing.

Our trip ended in Cozumel. We dove with a company called Blue Angel.

They were great. For example, at the beginning of our first dive, Shelby got stung by a jelly fish. She was obviously upset and wanted to get back on the boat. Our dive master was very understanding.

I really thought we were finished at this point. The dive master was very patient and helpful with Shelby. He never pressured us to go in for the second dive. After a while Shelby decided she wanted to get in again and try.

The dive was fantastic. We saw a giant eagle ray, a barracuda, and the beautiful reef. We had heard about drift diving in Cozumel and were excited to try. The current was strong and made for an easy dive. The day ended with some great fish tacos and a sense of amazement at the natural beauty of what we had just seen.

All in all the trip exceeded any expectations I had. The people were very open and eager to share their culture. On the subject of culture.....

Meet the "Bamboo Chicken", also known as the Iguana!

And here how the iguana becomes the bamboo chicken:

If you want to see more pictures, go to my Flickr page, there are some really good ones. I'll be posting about the dives in the next few days, so stay tuned!

2010: So Far, So Good

I realize the New Year has just begun, but:

• I am off for a western Caribbean cruise this weekend
• I just enjoyed an amazing holiday with friends and family, and
• Work is really good

In 2009 I committed myself to learning. I realize education never stops (except on Learn Nothing Day) but I have shifted my focus in 2010 to taking action. I really want to stretch myself and experience as much as I can.

So far, so good. I am facing a fear next week by doing my first ocean dive with my family. Diving is still new to me, and as excited as I am, I am still scared. BIG STRETCH.

I recently completed a coaching course, so now I am a certified coach. I will be building another part of my business which is another stretch.

I am also committed to some more speaking events this year. I love speaking and it is a lot of fun, but I am focusing more conscious energy to this area of my professional life. Say it with me now......STRETCH!

I am re-releasing my book, fresh with a new title, a new design, and super editing. I understand the business a little better now, so I am looking forward to what will happen with it. By the way, the book is Connected: The Art of Building Relationships, and it's pretty good.

Finally, my daughter will be eleven in a few weeks. WOW!!!!!! That is the quickest decade I have ever experienced. Wendy and I feel so lucky to live and experience life with Shelby. She is an amazing person and I look forward to what each day brings.

I hope you enjoy my little ramblings about my life, I certainly enjoy sharing them. So until next time, CARIBBEAN HERE WE COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!